Safety Planning For Leaving An Abusive Relationship

What to Do (If You Can) Before Leaving an Abusive Relationship:

  1. make a safety plan (call us at 250-341-3963; we can assist you)
  2. contact places in the community for support
  3. assess your safety and that of your children
  4. contact a shelter for a safe place to stay
  5. seek interim custody of your children
  6. seek a support system from family, friends & advocates


What To Take When You Leave:

  • ID:  drivers license, health care card, children’s health care card(s), birth certificates for you and your children, social insurance card (SIN), passport, court orders, marriage, separation &/or divorce agreements as well as any child custody agreements.
  • Financial papers:   debit cards, credit cards, any agreements for bonds, stocks, RRSP, RESP, cheque book, bank statements. If you can not locate the “cards”, collect the most recent bills, paid or unpaid as these will have the account numbers
  • Lease, rental agreement, house deed
  • Cash: if possible have some cash, both change & bills
  • Cell phone with charger & car charger
  • Medications & prescriptions
  • House keys, car keys
  • Address book, phone numbers
  • Current picture of your spouse (could be needed at your children’s school or with the RCMP)

Other things to consider if possible:

  • money
  • personal hygiene products
  • glasses/contact lenses & solution
  • clothing (night wear, underwear)
  • heirlooms, jewelry
  • photo albums (pictures that you want to keep)

For your children if possible:

  • soother/bottles
  • clothing (night wear, underwear)
  • special blanket, stuffy and/or toy


  • Medical:  have a complete medical and dental check up.  Be sure that you have medical and dental insurance (if available) in the event of separation
  • Mail:  review all mail coming into your house and make a list of the sender and return address.  It is important to know the address of stockbrokers, insurance companies, credit issuers.

If it is not safe to keep items in your home you might want to consider leaving them at a friend’s or a relative’s or at work or a hiding place (buried in a hole, in the car).

Please note that the above items are only things to think about.  only you know your situation and what you need to do to keep yourself safe.

Call 250-341-3963 to talk to one of our support workers.  We are here to listen and to help.

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